This year, Easter kind of snuck up on me. I’d spent all of March studying the Atonement and trying to figure out how to teach my Sunday school lesson on Easter Sunday, but hadn’t given hardly any thought (other than to purchase a ham) to celebrating Easter with our family. Literally, the day before Easter Noel and I talked about what we wanted to do. We decided we wanted to try splitting up the secular celebration of Easter (gifts and egg hunt) from the spiritual celebrations, which meant we would be doing our egg hunt that day. We swung by Target to pick up Easter shoes and buckets (deftly dodging the Zombie parents pushing around carts full of candy) and then mixed up some homemade egg dye at home.
While the kids watched a movie, Noel and I stuffed a few plastic eggs with candy family members had sent and some homemade peanut butter eggs.
Since the ground was still covered in snow, we hid the eggs inside, which allowed for a certain level of creativity.
The kids had a lot of fun finding the eggs and opening the gifts in their buckets (warm weather pajamas, Annie’s bunny crackers, and some things from their grandparents).
Then on Sunday we tried to focus on the spiritual aspects of Easter. Noel sang a beautiful rendition of “This is the Christ” in a double quartet and my Sunday School lesson was at the very least, meaningful to me. I of course didn’t take any pictures of anybody in their Easter clothes since we rushed out the door to get to church and people were already starting to undress by the time we made it back home. Plus, picture taking has never been my strong suit.
After a fancy dinner of ham, potatoes, croissants, and asparagus, we had a little lesson about Easter (aided by this lesson from Behold Your Little Ones and our church’s Bible Videos). The kids really impressed us with how much they were able to tell us about Christ’s death and resurrection.
We finished off the day with a little almond cream cake. At this point, Ellen realized we were winding down and started to whine about how we hadn’t done Easter yet. I asked her what Easter was about and she said, “Jesus.” We repeated the conversation a couple of times before she exasperatedly said, “Mom, but we haven’t found eggs!” When I reminded her we’d done our egg hunt the day before she was a little disappointed, but didn’t put up too much more of a fight. I really liked putting the egg hunt on a completely different day and will probably do it again in the future; the kids will get used to it eventually.
This is my third Light it Up Blue post (1.o and 2.0) and definitely the one I’ve worried over the least. This is the first year that I don’t choke up every time I talk about Autism, and the first year that it has felt truly “normal.” Yes, there’s been a few bumps in the road with Cooper now and again, but we’ve grown comfortable with ASD being a part of our lives – it’s our normal. I admit, I sometimes do get a twinge of sadness when I take him to the grocery store and he acts like a possessed beat boxer or when I realize other kids Cooper’s age are zooming around on bikes sans training wheels while he laboriously pedals at a snail’s pace even with the training wheel safety net, but I know he’ll get there, just in his own time and in his own way.
Cooper has grown so much. Remember last year how I was so depressed by Cooper’s performance in the Primary program? Well, this year he said audible words into the microphone and I cried for a completely different reason. He’s also blossoming at school. Just in the last month he’s started playing tag with the other kids when school is over – something he’d never wanted to do despite my encouragement. One afternoon he came up to me and asked me to tie his shoe and one of his classmates said, “Cooper can talk!?!” I said, “Of course he can talk” and then Cooper piped in, “I sure can!” which made me want to give him a million high fives. He’s growing and learning, and honestly, so are we. I’ve become less guarded about his Autism and at appropriate moments have told many people about it this last year. It has been unbelievably freeing. I don’t know if it’s my attitude about it or that we rub shoulders with a lot of great people, but 98% of the time people have been genuinely accepting and eager to learn more.
In some ways, our journey with Autism has been easy. We have awesome insurance, an outstanding support network, a cooperative therapy team, and a kid with a lovable temperament, but that isn’t everyone’s journey. One of the things that I found most surprising about the ASD world when I first wandered into it, was how divisive it can be, but I suppose that shouldn’t be too much of a surprise considering the amount of ground the spectrum covers. The diagnosis ranges from families that would do anything for a “cure” from the debilitation it brings to their children to individuals that shun “treatment” and call for universal acceptance of their quirky perspectives. I obviously fall somewhere in between. I want Cooper to succeed in the world, and I think that will only happen with both acceptance and treatment. I truly hope that balance can become the norm for the whole range of the spectrum.
I guess you could say Spring Break started early for Cooper since he didn’t go to school the last three days before the break. There’s a nasty cold that’s been going around and we all caught it. In two weeks we:
Went to our HMO’s Urgent Care twice.
Called the nurse hotline three times.
Visited the doctor’s office three times.
Treated two ear infections.
Learned you can get canker sores on your uvula.
Thankfully we have good insurance. All of the illness and related appointments made it so we weren’t able to leave for our trip as soon as expected. After we’d established that no one had anything life threatening, we decided to still go on the trip, just a day late. (This happened last year too, hopefully this won’t become a trend.) We weren’t really better, but the snowy weather was bumming us out and we figured we might as well be sick somewhere warm.
We left early Saturday morning. Despite the forecast predicting little to no accumulation of snow there was several inches on the ground and we slid through an intersection and into a curb on our way to the interstate. Luckily, the interstate was better plowed, but it still took 90 minutes to go the first 25 miles. (Ski traffic definitely didn’t help.)
As we got farther from home, the skies cleared and our spirits lifted. We stopped at a rest stop/park in Parachute and everyone shed their down coats and enjoyed the sun.
It was a long day of driving, but we made it to Capitol Reef just before dinner time. We were meeting up with the Walker clan and my parents. Hope and Joe were heading out that night so we only got to spend a few hours with them, but it was so nice to see them.
The fruit orchards were in bloom and we had fun singing a couple of rounds of “Popcorn Popping on the Apricot Tree.” Blossoming trees and red rock are some of my favorite things, so this part of the trip did my heart good.
Hope, Joe, and Porter stayed until after dinner and we almost got to a point where Porter wasn’t completely terrified of us. At the very least, he was brave enough to take Cheetos from us.
The next day we went on a little hike with my parents to Hickman Bridge. It was good to get out, but for the first time ever Noel and I found our hiking capabilities to only be as good as the kids.’ Turns out we were more worn out than we thought.
The kids had a blast with my parents and we were all sad to say goodbye to them after a brief picnic. As for us, we headed South to Escalante Petrified Forest State Park to continue our trip. This was our first visit to Capitol Reef and we’re definitely going back to hopefully see more next time.
We set up camp in Escalante and had a delicious dinner of rice, salmon, and asparagus. After roasting some marshmallows, we all took warm showers and went to bed. We all stayed warm and were relatively comfortable, but our sleep was still restless since we were all coughing and sniffling.
The next day, we took the kids to Devil’s Garden in the Grand Staircase Escalante National Monument. The kids loved the self-direction we gave them to climb and explore and probably put in more miles than if we’d been on a trail. We played there for quite awhile before the wind picked up and blew sand in everyone’s eyes. We headed back to the State Park and let Ellen take a much needed nap in the car.
Before we left, we knew we needed to check out the petrified wood. I’d read about it on my friend’s travel blog, 51 Cent Adventures, and knew we needed to check it out. The hike (Petrified Forest Trail and Trail of Sleeping Rainbows) was supposedly only 1.75 miles, but it felt much longer. Whether that was because it actually was or because we were kind of rundown, we may never know.
It was cool to see all the petrified trees. Noel said in some ways it was better than the Petrified Forest National Park, mostly because there were lots of small pieces of petrified wood here, whereas at the National Park most anything you can lift has been taken. (In spite of the fact that you aren’t supposed to do that . . .I don’t think it has anything to do with poor management on the National Park’s part, I think just a lot less people have visited the state park.)
That was our last night camping and we were all so ready to go home, eat ice cream, chill, and sleep in our own beds. The second I woke up I started packing up sleeping bags and pads. By the time Noel woke up (he’d moved to the car because he couldn’t stop coughing when he was lying down) I’d packed everything the kids weren’t sleeping on. (We are blessed with sound sleepers.) Generally when we camp we are the last people to leave the campground, but that day we were the first to leave. Before heading home, we stopped at Hell’s Backbone Grill in Boulder, UT. When we were first married we would wake up to Utah Public Radio, and at that time Hell’s Backbone Grill was one of their sponsors. Sometimes they would read the menu items and Noel and I would salivate longingly. We really wanted to eat there when we did our backpacking trip back in 2009, but we felt pretty scraggly by the time we were done and not really restaurant appropriate. While our kids are not necessarily restaurant appropriate, really ever, we decided to risk it and gave them a nice long talk about how they needed to behave themselves and not do things like throw fits or plates around. The food was amazing and really ended the trip on a positive note. They’d only been open for the season for a day or two so the staff was getting back into the routine. They were all very welcoming though and when our breakfast took a little longer than expected they more than placated us with some free streusel-topped apple cake. When the breakfast arrived, it was indeed heavenly.
We made it home safely on sunny, clear roads. After eating soup and popsicles, we slept amazingly with all of our humidifiers going. The next day we woke up to a blizzard (18+” by the end of the day!) and were so, so glad we were already home.
This year marked our 9th wedding anniversary. Noel and I put a lot of thought into what we wanted to do. We’re always tempted to dress up and try to do something fancy, but ultimately we decided we get more enjoyment out of owning who we are and doing something less fancy.
A friend kindly agreed to watch the kids and we headed up to a nearby open space park after picking up some Chinese takeout. We enjoyed our dinner as we watched the sunset. Then we went on a night hike and enjoyed the stars.
It might not be the typical anniversary celebration, but it was definitely true to who we are. Here’s to many more years of owning our unfanciness.
Ellen has been looking forward to her birthday since Christmas. (Admittedly, I felt very much the same way four years ago about her birth day, but with a lot more hormonal angst.) For months she would frequently tell us, “My birthday’s next!” This year, her birthday fell on a Monday which is a pretty busy (and very Cooper-centric) day for us and I was really worried about how to make the day feel special.
The Saturday before her birthday we took her to see Zootopia. The kids thought the movie was hilarious and it had a depth and sense of humor that also appealed to adults. After the movie was over though, Ellen was disappointed that we didn’t have cake and threw a minor fit when we reminded her that it wasn’t actually her birthday yet.
To torture her even more, I made her cake the evening before her birthday. She went to bed before it was frosted, but she was still pretty upset that I’d made cake, but didn’t let her have any. She chose Smitten Kitchen’s Best Birthday Cake. A choice I’m pretty sure she made primarily because of the sprinkles.
The morning of her birthday she was very excited to see the finished product and even more excited that I’d saved the scraps I’d cut off the layers to make them level for her to eat.
We let her open one present before Noel headed off to work and Cooper to school.
Then she and Cooper played with balloons instead of getting dressed and eating breakfast. Cooper was late for school, but it was the probably the first reason for checking him in late that didn’t annoy me terribly. (Some examples of previous reasons for being late include: Cooper wanted to wear the blue socks not the white ones, Ellen didn’t want to wear a coat, Cooper stared at his breakfast for 20 minutes and then decided he actually wanted to eat it when it was time to get in the car, and everyone slept in because we didn’t leave Urgent Care until two hours past bedtime.)
Noel hadn’t left for work yet when we got back which delighted Ellen. She LOVES her dad and cries if she doesn’t get to give him a big hug and a kiss before he goes to work.
While Cooper was at school I took Ellen to Target. She had some birthday money and I told her she could pick out a present. I think she enjoyed wandering the store looking at everything more than she actually enjoyed the toy she chose. We wound through the toy aisles for almost an hour with her exclaiming, “Look mom!” close to a thousand times. My patience with this exercise was probably my greatest birthday gift to her.
After we picked up Cooper, Ellen had a brief period of time that she could play with her My Little Pony play dough set that she chose. This picture is the last documentation of the colors being separate and recognizable.
Cooper had speech therapy in the afternoon and Ellen and I built this impressive marble run.
We spent a few minutes at home prepping dinner and then headed to swim lessons. Ellen loves swim lessons and is extremely confident in the water; however, she is not the most well-behaved pupil. When the instructor is helping the other kids she’s always jumping into the middle and splashing or trying to swim across the pool. One particularly bad day, Ellen got put in “swim lesson time out” so the instructor could uninhibitedly help the other kids. She graduated with excellent ratings on all of her skills, but the suggestion that she needs to listen more. It’s kind of funny because when I signed the kids up for lessons I worried a lot about how Cooper would handle them and he ended up being one of the best behaved kids in the class.
After showering off, we headed home where we opened the rest of Ellen’s gifts, skyped with some family, and then ate macaroni and cheese and cake.
This picture is from a few weeks later, but is a pretty good indication of Ellen’s personality. She’s feisty and spirited, but has the most tender moments when she’ll ask deep questions and genuinely listen. She’s sassy and full of energy, but never passes up an opportunity to snuggle. She can throw the hugest tantrum about absolutely nothing, but she always compliments my outfit choices. She hates having her hair done, but loves twirly dresses, jewelry, and having her nails painted. She will fight you tooth and nail to do anything that wasn’t her idea, but then will surprise us by volunteering to help empty the dishwasher with great enthusiasm. It’s sometimes a rollercoaster, but we’re glad to have Ellen in our lives.
It’s pretty much universal knowledge at this point that I love Groundhog Day. (For the history, read this post.) But even beloved holidays can grow a bit lackluster and I’d say the last few years have been just that.* This year my enthusiasm was back. It was my turn to teach Joy School and I’d planned an awesome, yet age appropriate, lesson about Groundhog Day history with fun books, art, and shadow activities. I was pretty psyched. Then Groundhog Day rewarded my enthusiasm with something even better: a blizzard that closed school and warranted a late start for all government offices. For the record, I am not snow’s number one fan, but when it comes to this type of precipitation my attitude is go big or go home.
In my opinion, the whole purpose of Groundhog Day is to break out of the rut of winter (cue The Wintry Day) and remember that life is worth not just living, but celebrating. The extra family time made it so we were really able to bring an appropriate level of wackiness to our festivities. We carved a Groundhog Day jack-o-lantern,** properly educated the children on this important holiday with my Joy School lesson, snowshoed through the neighborhood (much to the amusement of many neighbors), ate our traditional Rice Krispies treats, and of course watched Groundhog Day after the kids were asleep. It was my favorite Groundhog Day to date.
*In fact, I looked back through the blog and the last time I blogged about G-hog day was 2013 – and it was a pretty lame post considering it was my 10th anniversary celebration. I’m so ashamed.
**Halloween was atypical last year and our pumpkin never got carved. When the New Year rolled around and the pumpkin was still in great condition we cheered the winter squash on in hopes it would make it to Groundhog Day.
We aren’t big New Year’s people. I’m guessing it has something to do with being non-fancy-non-drinking-morning-people, but at least one of of us is really into New Year’s resolutions. I love the metaphorical clean slate and writing up a slew of goals for how I could be better. Even if I only meet a fraction of them, I still feel like I accomplished more than I would have if I hadn’t set any goals. (Clearly, blogging more was not one of my New Year’s Resolutions.) Noel isn’t quite as big on New Year’s resolutions and all the dreaming that comes with it. He prefers to make what he refers to as “plans.” Plans, resolutions, goals, dreams, or whatever they may be, I’m really excited for the vision we’ve created for 2016 and January is already off to a great start.
Our biggest joint goal is we’re finally going to try a triathlon. In preparation we’re taking swim lessons. Yes, as adults. It has been a somewhat humbling experience, but I think will save us a lot of embarrassment come race day. (And perhaps an emergency rescue.) We’ve also been trying to spend more quality time with family and actually enjoy winter. Check out the pictures for more details on what we’ve been up to.
Every time someone would ask us about our Christmas plans we would say, “We’re staying here – and we’re so happy about it!” As much as Noel and I love our families, we truly despise traveling this time of year (see Top Ten Worst Moments of last year’s Christmas) and are also enjoying figuring out our own traditions. Growing up, my family had a lot of Christmas traditions while Noel’s family wasn’t as committed to specific ways of doing things (except for the Santa thing, which we’ve disappointingly shunned – sorry Glenna!). At first these different backgrounds caused us to clash as I insisted we must choose and then instate our amazing traditions immediately and Noel countered that traditions are the things that stick after you’ve tried a bunch of different things. In the end, this combination is turning out to be a great one as I’ve relaxed about “trying on” traditions and Noel has joined my effort to curate our Christmas experiences.
Up until this year, Santa’s “existence” was something our children were surprisingly unexposed to, but this year suddenly everyone was asking the kids, “What is Santa bringing you for Christmas?” which provided me with the opportunity to have several awkward, yet discrete (I promise I’m not trying to blow this for anyone else), conversations about how while we do celebrate Christmas, we don’t do Santa.* People were generally polite, but confused about this news. Their faces were priceless as I could see how puzzled they were. How can you even celebrate Christmas without Santa? I think because it suddenly seemed like there was a huge gap in our Christmas celebrations, I felt a resurgent push to make sure our kids knew what Christmas was all about. Noel and I spent a long time pondering how to make Christmas special, but Christ-centered. When a gift from Noel’s sister, Danielle, arrived at our house with a 25 Days of Christ ornament advent we felt like we’d found our answer. The kids really enjoyed watching the Bible movie videos and putting the ornaments on the tree; I think this will be a tradition that sticks.
Another tradition we tried was going snowshoeing on Christmas day. We are all outdoors lovers which makes winter a bit depressing and we thought getting outside might make the holidays brighter for us. The actual implementation was a little less than desirable. We thought the kids would do better if we fed them right before, so we grilled hotdogs at a snowy campground. The kids had a great time, but when it came time to snowshoe they were already done. Less than 100 yards into the trail Ellen laid down in the snow and bawled. We returned back to the car shortly thereafter. A few days later we tried snowshoeing again with some changes (early morning after a good breakfast at home) and successfully went an impressive 3/4 of a mile before any significant meltdowns. (Seriously though, this is a snowshoeing record for our family.)
We tried out a couple of other traditions like the kids getting each other gifts (they each independently chose a potato head), singing carols around the piano, making cinnamon rolls for breakfast, and driving around to look at Christmas lights. In the end, we were able to review and discuss things we liked, didn’t like, and would like to try in the future.
*While our kids don’t believe in Santa, they do believe in the mailman: the kind old gentleman that brings packages and whose magical truck can be seen everywhere. We buy a lot of things from Amazon and the kids always give the mailman credit, not us.
I always have to warm up to Christmas. As much as I want it to be the most wonderful time of the year, sometimes it’s hard for me to be very joyful when the roads are icy and everywhere you turn there’s a barrage of commercialism.
This year it felt like it took extra effort on my part to really get into the Christmas spirit, but in the end I feel like all the work and soul searching has actually helped me get into the true spirit of the season more than I have the last couple of years. One of the best realizations I’ve had is that even though I want to create beloved traditions, the most memorable and special moments have been small ones – moments I might not have had if I didn’t take time to slow down and notice them.
This year, it was the unseasonably warm afternoon we went to the park to fly a kite and all laid down in the grass to look at a ladybug while we soaked up the sun. It was the night we tucked Cooper into bed and he requested the song “Angels We Have Hear on High” and then sang all the lyrics with us. It was the evening Noel and I binge watched some of our church’s Christmas messages with tears in our eyes. And today it was the moment I was leaving the grocery store with the kids and Cooper took Ellen’s hand and the two of them giggled as we crossed the parking lot. I looked at them in their pajamas with their unkempt hair and thought, “I love these kids so much” and said a silent prayer of gratitude. I am so grateful for those small moments that remind me what is most important in this world and especially grateful for the push this time of year brings to reflect on the birth and life of our Savior.