Young, Hot Mom

Young, Hot Mom

 “You can have a career anytime, but there’s only a short period of time you can                                 be a young hot mom.” – Cerie from 30 Rock

 A little over a year ago, some ladies from church invited me to join their book club. The first meeting I attended was held at a member’s house that I had not previously met. I’d chosen my outfit for the evening with care; something that nicely accentuated my new baby bump in a way that made it readily apparent that I was indeed pregnant. When I parked my car in front of the address I’d jotted down, it didn’t look like many people had arrived yet and I approached the door with the slight worry that I was at the wrong house. Armed with the month’s literary selection, I knocked on the door. The apprehensive face of the woman who answered did little to reassure me that I’d found the right address.

“Hi, I’m here for book club.” I held up the book the way detectives hold up their badges in crime shows.

“Oh? Oh!” The woman’s apprehension turned to puzzlement which she quickly tried to hide. “I don’t think I’ve met you before . . . ”

“Pam invited me.” I offered in an effort to lend myself some credibility.

“And how do you know Pam?” At this point I still hadn’t been invited inside and the questions felt less like small talk and more like an interrogation, albeit a kind one. Did they regularly have unwanted people try to sneak into their book club? Perhaps this was all more elite than I had thought.

“Um, I know her from church. She  lent me her book.” I held up the book again.

“Right, right come in.” She finally motioned me inside but continued questioning. “I haven’t been to church in a while, are you new?”

“Fairly. My husband and I just bought a house here a few months ago.” At this point the woman started laughing.

“I’m sorry,” she said, “When you came to the door I thought you were a high school student trying to earn money for a booster club or something. I was all prepared to tell you I didn’t want any cookies. You just look so young.”

I’ve spent the last fifteen years having people think I’m anywhere between five to ten years younger than I actually am. These type of encounters have always made me irrationally self-concious and have led me to defensively do silly things like consistently round up my age. (As if saying I’m 27 instead of 26  makes that big of a difference.) When we first moved to Colorado my age based insecurity peaked.  In Utah, based on my actual age I was in the normal age range to be a mom, but in Colorado I’m at least ten years younger based on actual age and an alarming 20+ years younger according to my falsely perceived age. Generally, if I see a young woman about my age at the park with  a bunch of kids she ends up being the nanny. Initially, I tried really hard to seem mature, but  it just translated into a boring wardrobe and undoubtedly standoffish conversations. I didn’t really have any friends and even worse it didn’t seem to make any difference on how old people thought I was. When I was put in charge of teaching the twelve-year-old girls at church one of the other women, who was only five years older than me mind you, even said, “Oh that’s perfect. You’re just a baby and were pretty much one of them just yesterday, so I’m sure you can relate really well.”  Her words stung and I wasn’t sure whether to punch her in the face or start crying. That first year that we lived here was a rough one.

One of the common things people tell me when they’re trying to apologize after grossly mistaking my age is, “You’ll enjoy it when you’re older.”  When we bought our house and thus switched to a different neighborhood and congregation I viewed  our move as a new start. I decided I was tired of being boring and wasn’t going to wait till I was old to  enjoy my “youthfulness.” I brought my flirty skirts out of hiding and adopted a good sense of humor. I decided I’d rather be fun than mature. This new change in attitude has been quite enjoyable. When I was pregnant with Ellen I had myself a good chuckle every time I got to use one of my calculated quips when someone at Target mistook me for a pregnant teen working on number two. And instead of feeling depressed when high school security officers mistake me for a student, I get a kick out of how their jaws drop when I tell them I’m flattered they could mistake me for a high schooler after I’ve had two kids.

Since I’ve quit being so uptight my age seems to be less of an issue and my circle of friends now ranges from women in their twenties to their nineties. Dare I say my new attitude about my age has made me more mature? Maybe . . . well, until you see me on the playground at the park with all the toddlers or dancing in the aisles at the grocery store anyway. But, at least I’m young enough to be able to do that 🙂

9 thoughts on “Young, Hot Mom

  1. I like Noel’s comment. 🙂 And your story made me laugh. I usually have the opposite problem- people always think I’m older than I am. Which makes me self-conscious when they find out how “young” I really am and they may not want to hang out with me anymore…? I’m sure there are pros and cons to both I guess.

  2. I love it. I hang out with such a geriatric crowd at church that I could be forty and they would still think I am young.

  3. Just wait until your kids are in high school and someone says “You’re not old enough to have kids that old.” … or college, You WILL appreciate it. 🙂

    And, I’m so happy you’re in book club and didn’t run away after your first time. 🙂

  4. I still look like I’m in high school. Sometimes I feel a little self-conscience in certain situations. I always think when Larrin and I are out in public people think we are a couple of high school teenagers that made poor choices and now have a child, haha. My husband is really young looking too. He’d look even younger if he shaved off his facial hair! We can be cool hot moms together 🙂

  5. I know you likely hear this a lot but I wish people would think I am young. I got confused for my best friend’s mother…. she’s six months older than me. I have also taken up a regimented eye cream schedule… yes, enjoy the youthfulness. 🙂

  6. I was talking to Danielle tonight about the same thing, and she asked if I’d read your blog! I’ve totally had to stop my self from saying 28 instead of 27. But when the employee at the rec center asks me if I’m under 18, I should smile, say yes, and save a dollar. Maybe next time. Thanks for reminding me I’m not alone 🙂

  7. I don’t think people think of me as young or old, but when I was in high school people often thought my middle-school-age sister was older than me. It was usually based on the picture we had in our front room. At least once it was my date that thought she was older 🙁 I think it was because she actually knows how to do her hair 🙂

  8. I can relate to pretty much all of your post, except of course having a good attitude about it 😉 A few months ago at a Young Women’s activity, someone was shocked when they found out that I was a leader. Then he told me I looked younger than most of the girls there… I’m hoping that at least meant I look like a Mia Maid instead of a Beehive…

    And then my sister’s date told her that he thought I was her for a split second when I answered the door, until he saw the baby and glasses. But I’ll take that one as a compliment after having two kids 🙂

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